In years past, around this time I have made lists of goals to accomplish throughout the year. In years past, I’d make big goals like complete a craft project every day for 100 days or write a blog post once a month or complete Ali Edwards’ One Little Word course. Each of these goals are worthwhile and valuable in their own way. Though looking back, I can see that I was trying to earn something by completing these goals.
On New Years Day, I woke up from some odd dreams, walked out into the living room, looked at the Christmas decoration hanging on the wall that reads JOY and decided that that should be my word for the year. When I first got the sign, it felt and looked awkward to me. I took that as a sign. (Ba dum tss)
Tonight I listened to a recording of a workshop Jess Lively did on the four symptoms of over identifying worth with work. During the workshop she talks about living with intention and flow and how so often our self-worth gets tied up in our work. It’s a long video at almost two hours long but she’s one of my favorite podcasters so I’d definitely recommend it. At one point, as kind of an aside, she mentions living without goals and how freeing it is, and you should try it sometime.
Tonight I’m thinking about the idea of a word of the year and to tell you the truth, there’s another word that I feel may be better suited for the year. That word is enough.
You know what else I’m thinking about tonight? Jay Pryor’s idea of shoulding all over yourself. I just love that phrase. To should all over yourself is to impose expectations on yourself. It’s believing “I should be married/have a family/house/whatever by now at thirty years old” and then feeling like shit about it because that’s not reality. Or it’s setting goals like making 100 things because achieving that goal will somehow prove something or make me a more worthy human being. I think the alternate to shoulding all over oneself is to live from the belief that we’re all on the exact right path and to live with compassion.
Anyway what I’m trying to say is this year I’m intentionally not making any goals. Just gonna go with the flow. And I have two words for the year: enough and joy. Because who cares if I should only have one. 💁